luna bar

wonder why i suddenly went to luna bar?

actually i've been wanting to go.. but didnt get a chance to go
cuz u know... i dont have much freedom

so there was one night when me, my bro, and my dad was on our way home from bidor
cuz we had to attend one of my dad's relative's daughter's wedding.
apparently it's their first daughter getting wed.
and they have like 5 daughters.
can u believe it? woah right

so i was talking to my bro la.. then dont know why suddenly i mentioned luna bar.. then i said that i wanna go and see. cuz nat said it was really really nice. so then he was like yeah... it's nice and blablabla

then few days or weeks later... he asked me to keep the 27th of may free.. then i was like why?? then he was like just keep it free la. but then... later he told me that he wants to bring me to luna bar.. but ill be really bored cuz he's going with his friends. so he asked me to bring 1 friend along. so i asked kim. since she has been wanting to go too..

and i was soooo smart to remember to bring a camera.. hahaa.. if not ill probably kill myself for not bringing. hahaa. so me and kim are deciding to go there for our bday. we normally celebrate together cuz our bdays are like 1 day apart. so cool eh. haha.

so here's a few pictures taken on that day. really REALLY nice place to just hang out with friends and talk and all.. really relaxing and all.. should go and check the place out. really really. it's on the 34th floor. and the place has 2 floors. actually in the day time... it's a swimming pool area. but at night... they turn it into a bar. so that's why there's a swimming pool in the middle. it's in some hotel.. cant remember what's the name of the hotel. cathay pacific or some hotel la. so that day when we went.... there were tons of caucasians. hehe.

the night view at the top. guess how high it is? it's at the 34th floor

haha.. me & kim love this sink so much that we couldnt resist taking pic of it. it's in the center of the washroom

another sink at the side. also quite nice one

kim & me

from the top view. looking down. it has 2 floors

me & kim love this part the most!

this is next to the top part.. it's the end of the whole place di. it's all fountains.

this is from the end of the place looking towards the bar.

the bar. super cool eh!

and above the bar.. u can see the kl tower

*better than life*

i was rewriting my testimony for the discipleship class. cuz i wasnt very happy with it. so i was thinking of what to write. what i would want to share with ppl bout what has God done in my life. and as i was listening to some specially chosen christian praise songs... haha.. this song started playing. it's really nice. by hillsongs





better than the riches of this world
better than the sound of my friend's voices
better than the biggest dreams of my heart
and that's just the start

better than getting what i say i need
better than living the life that i want to
better than the love anyone could give
Your love is

You hold me now in Your arms
and never let me go

You, oh Lord, make the sun shine
and the moon light in the night sky
You give me breath and all Your love
i give my heart to You because

i cant stop falling in love with You
ill never stop falling in love with You
i cant stop falling in love with You
ill never stop falling in love with You

random stuff

hmmmm... lots of regrets going on..

thoughts of what i should have SAID

thoughts of what i should have DONE

really killing me now.





sometimes i tell myself not to think so much

just take things as it is

if i didnt say or do something... then just let the regret pass

let the moment pass

but.......

i CANT seem to do THAT nowwwww!!!!





the moment keeps replaying and replaying in my head.

and this voice keeps telling me that i SHOULD HAVE done this

i SHOULD HAVE said that

ughhhh!!!! cant that silly voice leave me alone???

it's enough that i didnt do it

but this thing inside of me gotta keep reminding me over and over again what i didnt do or say

grrrrrr... soooo geram - ted






now now.. im not saying that im having split personalities and that there's this other person in me.

im just saying that i keep blaming myself over and over again

and telling myself WHY DIDNT I DO OR SAY SUCH AND SUCH!!! ughhhh
grrrrrr



well.... at least i have something to thank God for.. it's that He is the God of not only 2nd chances but infinity chances. haha. imagine if u missed a moment or a chance... then He'll shut the door on u. awww mann.. that'll suck man. ahaha. through this mistake today... i've realized this.. hmmm.. maybe it's not so bad after all.. u know going through this feeling. cuz it made me remember something that i've forgotten.

but i hope that this kinda regret will never happen.. and that i would remember God's promises. hehe



ahhhhh.. ok ok.. now i feel better after ranting on and on bout how i feel now. haha.. i do hope i feel better. ish ish. if not..... grrrrrr.. hahaha..

anyway.. im really tired now.. played badminton today again.


i played the whole day in school. me and my friend was suppose to take a test. hahaha.. but we were not ready to do it la. since our teacher keep complaining that we waste her time if we simply do our test. so therefore we didnt do. in the end....during lunch time, before we pray, kena scolding from her.. she just said it to the whole class that some ppl have to take test before the holiday. but didnt take it. and she continued bout some other things that she's not happy bout la. cant remember though. cuz honestly... i wasnt paying attention for a while. ahaha. oops. but she didnt specifically talk bout me and my friend. ish ish.. dont care la

so in the end... i had a GREAT time in school.. played bingo before lunch.. then after lunch we played mafia. quite a fun game. sometimes. haha. im surprised that my teacher let us play. ahha.

badminton & cg on the outside

my saturday was really good. played badminton with delz, ed, andrew, and kim in the morning. we played in emmmm.. cant remember what's the place called.. it's near subang parade there i guess.. hahaha. somewhere nearby la.


it was really fun playing with them. playing with a different bunch of ppl. on the way to the badminton place. i was telling delz that i've been seeing them sooo much. like 3 days in a row.. spending alot alot of time together. ahhaha. but.... they'll never fail to make everything fun and enjoyable!



then after that we went our own ways cuz we needed to prepare for cg on the outside. the youth had cg's at different different places. but learning bout the same things. it's a change la. cuz normally we would have it in church. so this was something different.

so anyway.. it was really really fun. my 2nd time worship leading. i wasnt THAT scared as the last time cuz this time.... it's among the girls.. smaller scale. so it wasnt that nerve racking.

then we had games.... hahaha.. a really crazy time cuz me, delz, and mich was the craziest among the rest. i didnt know what came over us. didnt know what made us all SO crazy. ahhaa.

this is group 2.. can u count our fingers? hehe

after the games we started the lesson. it was bout dating. really learnt alot of things from it. shared here and there. then delz told a story. really really interesting story i should say. but oh wells... i've heard it before. hahaa. but it's nice hearing it again.

the cg lesson was really great. i love talking bout bgr. i dont know why. it's really really interesting. i guess that's one of the topic that will never bore ppl. ahaha. everyone will surely be really interested in learning bout bgr.

and we took alot of pictures.. of courseeee!!! ahhaa

outside delz' house

nice anot? nice anot? ahah

thoughts....

isnt it funny?


that things happen when u least expect it?


isnt it funny?


that no matter how much u wish it happens.... at times it wont happen?


but i've realized that in God's time.... when u least expected it to happen... it happens.


im so so so SO amazed by God. by the things that He has done in my life and things that He can do.


everyday.... He never fails to surprise me.


truly each day... i experience different things... even though i might be doing the same things over and over again..

but i learn different things.


actually... i have alot of things to say one... but.... hahaha.. i forgotten all of it. cuz i took really long to update my blog. shucks cant remember.. this is as much as i can remember.

cuz what i've learnt this whole week is that.... things happens when u least expect it to.. in God's time. really. many times i've tried to speed up God's timing. i would be like God!!!!! why la sooo longggggg??? cant it like ZOOM and in a BLINK of an eye... it's there? haha.


but nahhhh.. i dont think that'll happen. i mean not always. it depends on what i guess..


but through all this waiting and all.. it really develops perseverance and faith in God.

this is the time where u learn to trust in God.. that He'll give u everything in due time.

updates..

well well... i've been wanting to update my blog. but well... laziness got the better of me. haahha.


hmmmm.. let's seee.. what's the most recent thing that i've done..




i enjoyed a great dinner with delz, ed, andrew, and kim last night. we went to rakuzen. i would advice those ppl who wants to try rakuzen that.......... emmmmmm.... DO NOT GO TO THE MT. KIARA OR HARTAMAS ONEEEEEE!!!! ok ok.. i dont know which one.. whether it's in mt. kiara or hartamas. can never differentiate the place. haha. so anyway... it's in plaza damas. oh my goodness.. the service was really bad. at first we were sitting at this place with 2 tables. so we didnt have much privacy... buttttt!!!! the best part was that we had this ringer or bell or something.. this thing la.. where we can press to call the waiter or waitress or whatever... but there was no privacy. so when we were walking around the restaurant - a pretty nice place i would say - then we discovered this nice sitting place. where we can have privacy... and the sitting is like a horseshoe.. so it was really really nice..




but... we didnt realize that there was no button thingy to press to call the waiter or waitress. sooooo.. it was really sucky.. cuz whenever we ask for something.. it takes a million years to come. and i dont know why my food is always the last to come. even the bill took really long. it's like before me, delz, and kim went to the toilet. they asked for the bill.. then when we came back.. the bill still havent come mannn!!!! can u believe it???????? and it's not like there's not much workers around. it's like seriously damn cacated lo. damn irritating. ughhhh!!! never gonna go back there again. sheesh.





then we wanted dessert at bon ton. but...... it shifted to dont know where. ish ish. was thinking of such a nice and yummy dessert but got let down. so we ended up going to ktz in kl. and gosh!!! it's so horrible. so sucky laa. sighhh.. but the whole night was full of fun, laughter, craziness, frustration(of the service in rakuzen), and the best of all...taking picturessss!!!!

me and delz at the table that has no privacy but has a button to press for the waiter or waitress


this is the horseshoe table...


kim, me, delz at ktz kl

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMYYY!!!!

today is my mummy's bday..


most of the time i hurt her...


but i really love her


i dont intentionally hurt her


i try to be a good girl


to be a daughter that every mum wants


if ever i become a mum... i want a daughter that treats me as her friend.
who says i love u.
who hugs me anytime.
who laughs and talk with me.
who shares her problem with me.
who looks to me whenever she needs anything.


but at times....


i cant become that daughter for my mum.


whenever things dont go my way...


ill shut her out of my life


i know it hurts her so much


i try to have God's unconditional love..


am still trying. hahaa


hope i get to succeed before anything happens =)


oh wellssss...


HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMMYYYYYYYY!!!!!

michie & me.. tying the balloons together for the children church's easter party 

we were really bored and tired on the way down  

yummy baskin&robbins *slurps* 

in maxim's spa. where kim works. super classy place!!!!! i wish i could stay there. ahhaa 

on the cable car! haha. we begged edward to go on it 

on a never ending stairs to a really disappointing field. haha 

leaving my house to go on a crazy journey. ahaha

*always*

love this song

VERY VERY muchie






did u rise the sun for me?
or paint a million stars that i might
know Your majesty?
is Your voice upon the wind?
is everything i've known marked
with my Makers fingerprints?

breathe on me
let me see Your face
ever i will seek You

cause all You are, is all i want, always
draw me close in Your arms
oh God, i wanna be with You

can i feel You in the rain?
abandon all i am to have You
capture me again
let the earth resound with praise
can You hear as all creation lives
to glorify one name?

firsts...

yesterday was my cousin's (eugene) wedding. the couples name are eugene and ginie. so in short it's euginie. and the theme was PINK and ivory

i went through some things for the first time... i.e first 'chip san leong' or where the groom and the heng dai's will go over to the bride's house and go through some torturing moments planned by the chee mui's before getting to see the bride. and also being a bridesmaid.



me and ginie got to know when the groom and the heng dai's arrive. cuz they were like honking real loudly. and that time was like really early in the morning. i think if im their neighbors, ill be so frust. cuz on an early saturday morning... there's this bunch of ppl who is honking their car horns so loudly and so long. haha.




the 'chip san leong' part was ok i guess. cuz i got to sit with her in the nice air conditioned room and i was putting my ear to the door and telling her what's happening and who said what and stuff like that. wish i could be out there watching the girls torture the guys. the guys enjoyed it la. they found the food rather tasty. haha.



so after the groom get to see the bride. the 'cham cha' or tea ceremony begins. and then i dont know what to do cuz there were like tons of cameraman everywhere. so i didnt know how to stand by her side when all the cameramen was right next to her. sigh. and the bride's side had more relatives. so it took really long. and she followed some chinese tradition that i've never heard before. so it was quite interesting la.



so after the tea ceremony in ginie's house, we went on to the groom's house. but we were ahead of time. so we were like waiting for a while before leaving the bride's house.




the journey to the house was REALLY REALLY interesting. cuz the video recording guy (dont know what u call him) was like sticking his body out of the car and recording the bridal car. taking pictures of them in the car. and we were on the highway u know. so they planned la. when isit safe for them to start recording and taking pictures. it really felt like we were recording some jackie chan movie. haha.




so we reached early to the groom's house. so we had to make a detour and stop and chit chat for a while before arriving to the groom's house.




throughout the whole time i had to be with ginie.. besides private moments. of course. haha.





so after the 'cham cha'.. me, ginie, and my uncle went to the saloon and wash our hairs. after getting that done. we went back and i manage to get a few minutes of rest. i manage to drink some 100 plus before i restart my engines. haha.




so after a few minutes. we had to leave for eastin. we arrived around 2.30 something. then we went up to the room and then sharon(church member and make up artist) did my make up first. then we waited for ginie to freshen up and all. so again... i manage to rest for a while. watched some tv. watched some pool and there's something bout mary movie. after a few minutes of that. i accompanied andrew down to the ballroom cuz he needed to check some stuffs.





then i went up and change and then help ginie with her gown. then we went down for the ceremony.






throughout the whole ceremony. i really didnt know what to do. i was so nervous... and i was so scared that ill do something stupid to ruin the whole wedding. argh. but the ceremony passed by really fast and then it was the photography session. so i manage to take some pictures. haha. wonder if ill ever get the rest of the pictures. hmmmm. hehe. so anyway...




then it was the dinner session. i didnt need to do much after that. only needed to help her change into her pink dress that's all. so it wasnt that bad la for the dinner. enjoyed the dinner. eventhough i was really sleepy during the dinner. i tried to enjoy the night. hehe.




i would like to say that the whole thing was really bad. cuz i didnt know what to do. not really a good bridesmaid. haha. but it was a really good experience. i would want to be a bridesmaid again next time. not soon... not in few years time. haha.



awwww mannn.. if now im so stressed out right. and it's not even my own wedding u know. i cant imagine on my wedding day. i think ill be like *faint-ed* hahaha. there's like so many things to plan and do. oh gosshhhH!!! haha.

SUPER nice car weiiii!!!!!! wish i could have it.... but.... at least i got to ride in it. hehe

christine & me. with my bridesmaid flower. hehe 

me and lay yan a.k.a my kai cheh. hehe 

me and my bro.. ahh.. a more recent one of him. hehhe 

jess & me & delz 

me & delz in euginie's wedding 

my brother wing lian with our cousins.. jun yi and halle *i think that's how u spell their name..cant remember. haha.. he looks really horrible here.. hahaha.. im so bad.. but he doesnt really like to take pictures.. unlike me =)

i miss my brother *sob*

i miss my brother sooo muchhhhh!!!!!

nothing happened to my brother... it's just that he and my eldest brother changed places.. my eldest brother was staying in the condo. but recently wing lian's friend's wanted to find another place to rent..so my bro suggested our condo la. so he went there to stay with them

ok ok.. i have 2 brother's.. just in case u guys get confused.. wing lian a.k.a nick is my 2nd brother. han lian a.k.a brian is my eldest brother. and the one im closer to is my 2nd brother

emmm.. so like last week wing lian moved to the condo and few days later.. han lian moved here to the house. and things has been different. cuz im closer to my 2nd brother. really miss him.. miss his presence in the house. even though he may bully me or kacau me from time to time and it's really irritating sometimes.......but i really REALLY do miss him.

no one can ever replace my brother's place in my heart.

yummy ice cream for a hot day 

a trip to lake garden

our youth had a day away in lake garden yesterday. it was quite fun...bonding with ppl. hehe. and i didnt know taman tasik perdana means lake garden. haha. when we were reaching there, i saw the sign saying taman tasik perdana.. then i was like.. ehhh.. i didnt know they changed the venue. haha. then i saw some small words below and it says lake garden. then i was like OHHHH. ahahha. didnt know that. but oh wells...now i know.. haha.

it was quite hot and sunny yesterday. we played dog&bone and ultimate frisbee and the guys had tug-of-war later. gosh! it was so gross to run around in the wet grass. yucks! so super gross. so i decided not to dirty myself and just walk not run. ahhaa.

and i gotta give credit to the cleaner's of the toilet. i really wanted to tell them GOOD JOB!! but didnt know how to say it in malay. so decided to keep it to myself. haha. or else they might think im some crazy person. the toilet was really really clean. i mean not as clean as my toilet la. haha. but at least u can use it.

and after that some of us went to eat a&w.. wahhh.. the rootbeer float is really mouth watering *slurp* *wipes off saliva* hahaha. i should try the coney dog next time. hehe. if i ever go there again.

my first accident.. the damage i cost myself mentally. and my parents wallet 

my new highlights 

God never fails to amaze me

as my nick above says. God never fails to amaze me.

me and my parents was like stuck in the car cuz of the jam going into subang for prayer meeting...so we were talking bout my church's 2nd service. and my parents was saying why they dont have the children church run simultaneously with the service. then we dont have to have another service. then we were talking la bout all these. between the chinese church and our english side.

and the next morning. when i did my quiet time. it was talking bout relying on God's plans. eventhough we might not see God's plans now. but He's planning something far more greater than our imaginations. and that we shouldnt depend on our human sight but believe and have faith in God that He'll provide the money, the ppl, and everything that we need to expand His kingdom.

and the story in the quiet time was talking bout this person who is like expanding their church 'facilities' and that they dont see the future.. like they dont see how things is gonna work out. but they learnt that they gotta depend and rely on God to plan and provide for them.



when i was doing my quiet time...i really sat in awe.. that God would even provide an answer to my doubtful heart. i felt that He listened to me. and that He explained things to me. now now... im not saying that He'll always explained things and give u an answer instantly. sometimes it may take days, weeks, months, and sad to say years... i dont know why God would take that long or that fast. but it's all in His plans lo. that's what i've gotta say. He'll give the answers and explanations in due time. u'll know the reason in the right and appropriate time.

but in the mean time.. while waiting for God's answers and plans to reveal before ur eyes.. ahha.. u gotta trust and believe and rely on Him.




trust that He'll bring u through the hardships.
believe that He'll always be there.
rely on Him in every situation u go through

highlighted my hair

well well well. haha. i highlighted my hair on saturday. i wasnt scared at first. like u know whether my teacher's allow my to have bright colors. but when i went to school on monday, the teacher's didnt make noise. so oh wellz. but whenever i dye my hair. they dont seem to notice. so i was like whatever. ahha. so anyway... i went to the saloon at like 10.30, when they open the shop. haha.

firstly, i had to dye a base color. that's why it cost so much. cuz i already dyed mahogany copper like last year. so it's in a growing out stage. so the hairstylist was telling me that it'll look ugly if i highlight over it. so had to dye a like-colored base color.

secondly, the highlighting part. so i sat there feeling like a "princess". cuz i felt like they were waiting on me hand & foot. ahha. so anyway, that's just crap talk. then after they put the color on my hair. they put this machine over my head. it's like there's 2 moving semi-circle's that will move up and down my hair. blowing hot air. they say that it's faster for the color to get into the hair or something. dont know what la. whatever. but they say my hair was easy to color. cuz the color gets in fast.

then after that. i had a trim. so all together i took like 3 hour plus to get my hair done. and i missed discipleship class cuz of that. but what to do. my mum is not free on weekdays. everytime when i need to get up and wash my hair... ill be like ahhh.. relieve. can move. ahha. ill put a pic of my new hair up one day. cuz right now it's taking a LONG time to load. sheesh

*all*

You're the One who gives me shelter
and You're the light that leads me home
You're the love that gave forever
Lord, You're all that i know

and all that i am
unto You i surrender
Lord there is none like You
and i know that i stand
in the arms of forever
Lord there is none like You

with the world upon Your shoulders
Lord You gave Your life away
if the world i know was over
i know id have life in the price You paid

and i will stand
and i will worship You forever
for all You are
and i will stand
and all to You i will surrender
ill worship You forever

amazed.at.God's.love

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u are darn annoying?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u are darn irritating?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u sin again and again?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u break ur promises again and again?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u hurt His or one's feelings?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u judge/hate others?

have u ever wondered how God love u so much even when u dont love Him?

here i am. thinking everyday. how can God do that? maybe that's why He's God. He's our awesome, wonderful Father.

ive always wanted and still want His love. i want to pass His love around. but sometimes it's not THAT easy.

i pray everday that i can make good and wise choices and decisions in life.
that ill look to Him no matter the circumstances.
but everytime when im in a bad situation..or when things dont go my way,
i tend to forget bout God and ill be fuming away.
hating everything in life.
hating myself, family, person who did something wrong to me, and so on and so forth.

but i've found the answer whenever im angry.
that is to listen to worship songs
cuz that's when i slowly submit to God

there was once Eng Kok was saying.. "how can u live a life where u watch gross movies, speaking bad words, telling dirty jokes and after that u go and worship God"
that's when it struck me.
how can i do that.
and that i ought to live a life of worship
worship doesnt only mean singing
it also means ur life

im really trying hard to be a good example
though it's not easy
but im drawing strength, love, perseverance, and patience from God

sometimes u think u can do things on ur own
even the simplest things in life
u think "bahss.. why do i need God in such a simple thing"
but i've learnt that in everything.
include God in it
as much as u want ur loved ones in ur life
u should want that for God too

im not saying that im doing everything i said above
im still learning each day
learning to put God first
learning to give Him the throne of my heart

i admit that i still have half of my butt sitting on the throne of my heart
i still havent given my heart and life fully to God yet
notice the word YET?
yeah.. im hoping and praying, with the help of God, that one day
He'll be in control of my heart, life, decisions, choices, future

futsal

played futsal today. instead of the usual badminton. the guys decided to change it to futsal. and haha. i thought that by playing this time, i would somehow like futsal. but guess not. nothing can change my mind bout futsal. ahha

guess im NOT good in playing anything that involves kicking a ball with my legs. haha. pretty bad in that. ahha. but ok la. i gotta admit that it was a fun time la. haha. but the guys was pretty scary. ahaha. i think im better sitting at the chair and watching than actually playing it. ahha.

my conclusion for the day:

NO MORE FUTSAL FOR ESTHER! ahhaa.

*secret love*

soundtrack from shark tale.

really nice song.

explains how i feel. hehe

just a friend
that's all i've been to u
oh just a girl
who wants to be the center of ur world
but i aint got much to offer
but my heart and soul
and i guess that's not enough
for u to notice me
im just a girl
and i guess that's all i'll ever be to u

i try to smile when i see other girls with u
acting like everything is ok
but ohh
u dont know how it feels to be so in love
with someone who doesnt know
my secret love

in my dreams
i see us both together constantly
why cant u see
this love that's here for u inside of me
what do i have to do
for u to notice this