i woke up this morning. hoping that i can get a day off from work today. because my legs ached so badly after 2 days of walking back and forth the shop. fulfilling the every wish of the manager. she's nice no doubt. but she can be scary. if she doesnt smile when she looks at u, she can look like a b***h or "chun" la.
these 2 days, actually last week as well, i've been working my butt off. hanging and putting back the clothes after it has been tried. only once in a while the other people would help me, but most of the time, they just stand together near the fitting room and talk. they say that they're waiting to serve the customer.
one of the people that i work with is worse. she claims that she's serving the customer but her job is so simple. she just stand near the fitting room and ask them how is it. if they dont like it, she dumps it into the bucket. if they like it, she goes and get new clothes for them. she waits till the bucket is full then she drags it to me and say it's my job. when she's not doing anything, she doesnt even come and help. there was once, she took a few clothes from the bucket and hang it back, and i was walking around trying to arrange the clothes and accessories, then she came to me, can u put it back? i want to serve the customer. im like "harloooooooooooo....!!!!!! the customer is still trying on the millions of clothes that she brought in. and it's just 5 clothes... cant u hang it back urself????" but of course i didnt say that out loud. u know me..... timid and never stand up for what i want.
and everyday since last week, i keep having headache when it comes to bout 4-5 o'clock. can u imagine it? having a severe headache and running back and forth the shop. sigh. it just caused me to dislike work even more. i used to be able to enjoy it. that's why i took the day off today. my legs is so painful that i can even stand or walk right. it amazes me by how im able to stand in the shower everyday after work. when i come home, it's like im on numb mode. my whole body, head, and mind are like a robot once im home.
as i was doing my QT just now, i read from 1 peter 5:6-11. actually it was suppose to be 8-11 but the other 2 verses was colored so just read it anyway. but it touched me even more.
1 Peter 5:6-11
v6 "humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time"
v7 "cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you"
v8 "be self-controlled and alert. your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."
v9 "resist him, standing firm in the faith,because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings"
v10 "and the God of all grace, who called you into His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast"
v11 "to Him be the power forever and ever. Amen"
it left me speechless once i read this.
once again, God has showed Himself real to me.
once again, He never fails to amaze me.
once again, He showed that He cared.
once again, i felt that im something in His sight. no longer insignificant
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
friends
one is known and popular when one has countless number of friends. when one is known among people and is constantly in people memories. it can be said that having friends is one of the necessities in life. without having at least one friend, we may feel "lost". no one to talk to, no one to confide with, no one to share life's unexpected turns.
for me, ever since high school, it has gone down hill. what do i mean, u ask... let's just say that during high school, it was easy for me to find friends. soon, they became my closest friends. it's easy because i see them everyday in school. spending time with them. ever since i left high school, it has been hard for me to keep in touch. im not very good in keeping in touch. guess that's when i lost them.
im only good in keeping in touch when i have a common place to meet them. like school, i see them more often because u have to go there for 5 days a week. some people say that u spend more time with friends at school than u do with ur family. once school isnt a common place for me and my friends, slowly, i begin to lose contact with them.
i started working in cats whiskers at bangsar. and it felt weird because here i was meeting new people. and after a week or so, they were like my friends. they were nice to me. talk to me bout everything. shared with me bout their lives. and it made me feel like i was a part of them. they were the ones who made me enjoy working at cats even though it was tiring. it was kinda like back at high school... where u cant wait for the next day to come so that u can go to school and meet ur friends.
when i entered into college, it was a whole new scenario. having "thousands" of people in the same building. seeing the same faces everyday except that u dont know their names. im quite good at faces. once i've seen u, i can remember u the next time. i guess that's the worse part. i remember them but they dont remember me.
it was worse when i started class and we only have like 5-6 people in the class. then we hung out and ate lunch together. then botswana students came in. and everyone separated, finding their own cliques. by then, i wasnt close to the 5-6 people anymore. and whenever i see them in the hallway or in college itself, they just pretended that they dont know me and walk pass me.
that was the worst part. when people u knew back then, just walk pass u and pretend they didnt know u. not even a single "hello" or a smile. i felt like an idiot when i smiled at them. it was really sad for me because by then i realize how hard it is to find people whom u can call "friend". i mean i had a few friends that i ate lunch with, studied with, and hung out with but still.... i felt like i didnt belong anywhere. i felt so horrible because i wasnt close to my high school friends anymore.
now, here i am. working at cats again. hoping to find friends. the kinda friends that makes me wanna go back to work the next day. but the people that im working with now.....makes me dread coming to work. because they are the exact same people like my college "friends".
i just feel that im one of the characters in a book. one that is spoken about and then after a while, if u dont read the book anymore, u'll forget bout the character and what happened to the character.
while writing bout this post, it reminded me of the song - who am i by casting crowns. and it's really true. that we're like a flower quickly fading, a wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind but still he choose to care and call us His.
peace came over me because after all that i've felt... at least i have God, my Father, my Lover, my FRIEND to count on. im sure His love for me and His longing to be my friend is greater than anyone here on earth.
for me, ever since high school, it has gone down hill. what do i mean, u ask... let's just say that during high school, it was easy for me to find friends. soon, they became my closest friends. it's easy because i see them everyday in school. spending time with them. ever since i left high school, it has been hard for me to keep in touch. im not very good in keeping in touch. guess that's when i lost them.
im only good in keeping in touch when i have a common place to meet them. like school, i see them more often because u have to go there for 5 days a week. some people say that u spend more time with friends at school than u do with ur family. once school isnt a common place for me and my friends, slowly, i begin to lose contact with them.
i started working in cats whiskers at bangsar. and it felt weird because here i was meeting new people. and after a week or so, they were like my friends. they were nice to me. talk to me bout everything. shared with me bout their lives. and it made me feel like i was a part of them. they were the ones who made me enjoy working at cats even though it was tiring. it was kinda like back at high school... where u cant wait for the next day to come so that u can go to school and meet ur friends.
when i entered into college, it was a whole new scenario. having "thousands" of people in the same building. seeing the same faces everyday except that u dont know their names. im quite good at faces. once i've seen u, i can remember u the next time. i guess that's the worse part. i remember them but they dont remember me.
it was worse when i started class and we only have like 5-6 people in the class. then we hung out and ate lunch together. then botswana students came in. and everyone separated, finding their own cliques. by then, i wasnt close to the 5-6 people anymore. and whenever i see them in the hallway or in college itself, they just pretended that they dont know me and walk pass me.
that was the worst part. when people u knew back then, just walk pass u and pretend they didnt know u. not even a single "hello" or a smile. i felt like an idiot when i smiled at them. it was really sad for me because by then i realize how hard it is to find people whom u can call "friend". i mean i had a few friends that i ate lunch with, studied with, and hung out with but still.... i felt like i didnt belong anywhere. i felt so horrible because i wasnt close to my high school friends anymore.
now, here i am. working at cats again. hoping to find friends. the kinda friends that makes me wanna go back to work the next day. but the people that im working with now.....makes me dread coming to work. because they are the exact same people like my college "friends".
i just feel that im one of the characters in a book. one that is spoken about and then after a while, if u dont read the book anymore, u'll forget bout the character and what happened to the character.
while writing bout this post, it reminded me of the song - who am i by casting crowns. and it's really true. that we're like a flower quickly fading, a wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind but still he choose to care and call us His.
peace came over me because after all that i've felt... at least i have God, my Father, my Lover, my FRIEND to count on. im sure His love for me and His longing to be my friend is greater than anyone here on earth.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
the many happenings
2 big, huge happenings last year..
i know i know... it's a little too late for me to post it. since it's like long time ago right. oh wells.... who cares. hahaha.
as for my BM, i was pretty upset that i failed it. i tried talking to my lecturers and even the head of the pre-u department about my inability to speak or write in proper BM sentences. finally, they managed to find something for me to do to make me pass. really really thank God because 3 people that i've met in the pre-u department told me that nothing can be done and that i have to retake the stupid BM course again which costs bout rm 320. luckily my BM lecturer which was the 2nd person whom i talked to was a really really nice person she asked me to talk to the head of the pre-u deparment since she's a temp and cant make any decisions. she liked me. she said that i was like 1 out of 10 teenage ppl who bersopan santun to older ppl. whatever that means. haha. but i think it was something nice. hahaha.
as for this month, im taking a self-declared holiday because im just too lazy to go out and ask bout my future opportunities. i mean..... not lazy... but just trying to delay stuff u know..? hahaha. bahs. sheesh
yesterday was one of the worst day of my life.
i was really dreading the whole day. what with the public holiday... everyone suddenly became richer and decided to have some retail therapy. i was telling my friend that we should just leave the clothes in the bucket and let them find it themselves. because the bucket was near the couch. so they would just sit there and rummage through the whole thing. so what's the used of us doing the extra work eh...? hehehe
i left early from work. left at bout 6 to the airport. i didnt feel sad on the way there.............. UNTIL....... i saw a few airplane landing and taking off. then did i realize that it's real that my brother is leaving. throughout the whole week, i kept thinking whether i will cry in the airport (because when he left for canada the last time, i cried) or whether i will be sad that he's leaving.
imagine my shock when the tears came when he hugged me and even more when he left and we were hanging around the sending-the-person-off area. i sobbed so loud wei. haha. no la. actually when i saw those planes landing and taking off, i already had tears in my eyes. just that i willed myself not to cry and be strong. even when i came home, it felt weird seeing an empty room. it's not THAT empty, what with my junk that im too lazy to clear off, but it was empty with his junk. normally my room would be super SUPER messy cuz of his stuff flying here and there *evil grin*
i cried even when i was going to sleep because he wont.....
come into my room in the middle of the night to go the toilet - not that i always notice it... hahaha
be digging his nose and wiping it off on my clothes
wake me up with a whistle and trying to act like the black guy from white chicks
fetch me to places
buy me mcd's at weird hours of the day
mess up my room
get on my nerves
bully me anymore
be able to make me his "slave" - i guess that's what younger siblings are for
fight for the toilet with me - now i just have to fight with han lian
fart or burp near me
be torturing my dogs anymore
actually..... there's alot more bout him that i'll miss. but im just too lazy to write bout it somemore. ahah. so oh wells. and it's late now anyways. gotta go sleep. and i know that his head is gonna be so HUGE after reading this. ahhaa. awwww man... writing this post makes me cry somemore. ish! stop it....!
.jpg)
i MISS u so much khoh khoh!!!! ='(
- my brother planned to go aussieland for good
- i failed my BM
i know i know... it's a little too late for me to post it. since it's like long time ago right. oh wells.... who cares. hahaha.
as for my BM, i was pretty upset that i failed it. i tried talking to my lecturers and even the head of the pre-u department about my inability to speak or write in proper BM sentences. finally, they managed to find something for me to do to make me pass. really really thank God because 3 people that i've met in the pre-u department told me that nothing can be done and that i have to retake the stupid BM course again which costs bout rm 320. luckily my BM lecturer which was the 2nd person whom i talked to was a really really nice person she asked me to talk to the head of the pre-u deparment since she's a temp and cant make any decisions. she liked me. she said that i was like 1 out of 10 teenage ppl who bersopan santun to older ppl. whatever that means. haha. but i think it was something nice. hahaha.
as for this month, im taking a self-declared holiday because im just too lazy to go out and ask bout my future opportunities. i mean..... not lazy... but just trying to delay stuff u know..? hahaha. bahs. sheesh
yesterday was one of the worst day of my life.
- i had to work on a public holiday
- my brother was leaving at night
i was really dreading the whole day. what with the public holiday... everyone suddenly became richer and decided to have some retail therapy. i was telling my friend that we should just leave the clothes in the bucket and let them find it themselves. because the bucket was near the couch. so they would just sit there and rummage through the whole thing. so what's the used of us doing the extra work eh...? hehehe
i left early from work. left at bout 6 to the airport. i didnt feel sad on the way there.............. UNTIL....... i saw a few airplane landing and taking off. then did i realize that it's real that my brother is leaving. throughout the whole week, i kept thinking whether i will cry in the airport (because when he left for canada the last time, i cried) or whether i will be sad that he's leaving.
imagine my shock when the tears came when he hugged me and even more when he left and we were hanging around the sending-the-person-off area. i sobbed so loud wei. haha. no la. actually when i saw those planes landing and taking off, i already had tears in my eyes. just that i willed myself not to cry and be strong. even when i came home, it felt weird seeing an empty room. it's not THAT empty, what with my junk that im too lazy to clear off, but it was empty with his junk. normally my room would be super SUPER messy cuz of his stuff flying here and there *evil grin*
i cried even when i was going to sleep because he wont.....
come into my room in the middle of the night to go the toilet - not that i always notice it... hahaha
be digging his nose and wiping it off on my clothes
wake me up with a whistle and trying to act like the black guy from white chicks
fetch me to places
buy me mcd's at weird hours of the day
mess up my room
get on my nerves
bully me anymore
be able to make me his "slave" - i guess that's what younger siblings are for
fight for the toilet with me - now i just have to fight with han lian
fart or burp near me
be torturing my dogs anymore
actually..... there's alot more bout him that i'll miss. but im just too lazy to write bout it somemore. ahah. so oh wells. and it's late now anyways. gotta go sleep. and i know that his head is gonna be so HUGE after reading this. ahhaa. awwww man... writing this post makes me cry somemore. ish! stop it....!
.jpg)
i MISS u so much khoh khoh!!!! ='(Wednesday, January 02, 2008
exciting year?
well well well... the much infamous phrase......
2007 has gone and 2008 is here
i've been missing for quite some time. too lazy to update my blog. but after much blog stalking, it has caused me to think back bout 2007. bout how much i've done, how far i've come, how much i've grown
honestly saying.... im not ready to let go of 2007. it's not like i've had many exciting events in 2007. but im just not ready to be 20 this year. can u believe it...? im 20 this year??? i cant believe it. haha.
i remember......
my new years resolution - which i dont think i've accomplished anything
my first class for my foundation - which was nerve wrecking
my first valentine's day with kevin
being so filled with homework and assignments - which i thought i was gonna die
my first sem exams
meeting new people in college - being unable to accept the fact that im in college
our first year anniversary
the fights, the moments where i feel like giving up
having big plans that i've wanted to do for God
thinking that im not good enough but took on alot more things than i expected
feeling lonely cuz i felt like i've lost all my friends
i thought i was the weird one. cuz i felt like last year passed by so quickly. guess im not the only one. even saying 'last year' feels weird. cuz i still feel like im in 2007. bahs. i hope that the reason why i felt like the year passed by so fast is because i was doing alot of fun and exciting stuff and not cause i was wasting my time doing nonsense.
i hope 2008 will be way way better than 2007. with more accomplishments and achievements. i dont want to end 2008 feeling like i've done nothing other than being an excellent couch potato.
an impromptu trip up to genting after my trip from malacca
thanks jon, marc, and my darling for my first spontaneous trip! =)
enjoyed it =)
i've been missing for quite some time. too lazy to update my blog. but after much blog stalking, it has caused me to think back bout 2007. bout how much i've done, how far i've come, how much i've grown
honestly saying.... im not ready to let go of 2007. it's not like i've had many exciting events in 2007. but im just not ready to be 20 this year. can u believe it...? im 20 this year??? i cant believe it. haha.
i remember......
my new years resolution - which i dont think i've accomplished anything
my first class for my foundation - which was nerve wrecking
my first valentine's day with kevin
being so filled with homework and assignments - which i thought i was gonna die
my first sem exams
meeting new people in college - being unable to accept the fact that im in college
our first year anniversary
the fights, the moments where i feel like giving up
having big plans that i've wanted to do for God
thinking that im not good enough but took on alot more things than i expected
feeling lonely cuz i felt like i've lost all my friends
i thought i was the weird one. cuz i felt like last year passed by so quickly. guess im not the only one. even saying 'last year' feels weird. cuz i still feel like im in 2007. bahs. i hope that the reason why i felt like the year passed by so fast is because i was doing alot of fun and exciting stuff and not cause i was wasting my time doing nonsense.
i hope 2008 will be way way better than 2007. with more accomplishments and achievements. i dont want to end 2008 feeling like i've done nothing other than being an excellent couch potato.
an impromptu trip up to genting after my trip from malaccathanks jon, marc, and my darling for my first spontaneous trip! =)
enjoyed it =)
i wish u all a GREAT and EXCITING new year!
with more adventures and unexpected AWESOME plans from God
watchnight 07
love u girls!
with more adventures and unexpected AWESOME plans from God
watchnight 07love u girls!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
