i learnt

i've learnt not to procrastinate
but yet i still do, no matter how many times i tell myself



i've learnt not to expect so much from a person
because when u dont get what u expect, u'll be damn sad
but yet i still expect too much



i've learnt not to think so much
but yet i still think alot, and i mean alot
too much to even count it



i've learnt to let God have control over my life
but yet i still wanna take over and tell Him how it's done



i've learnt to not be so sensitive
but yet i still take everything personally



i've learnt to forgive and forget
but yet i still keep everything inside
bottle it up and bury it deep down inside



i've learnt to say im sorry whenever i know i did something wrong
but yet sometimes i still let my pride get the best of me






u think i dont miss the times where we can laugh non-stop?
we laugh at almost nothing at all
and u know that even a simple thing would make me burst out in laughter


u think i dont miss the times where we get to spend the whole day together?
it's enough just knowing that we're together
sitting or walking side-by-side



u think i dont miss the times where we can talk bout anything?
where we would just call or sms each other for nothing



u think i dont miss the times where we are all lovey-dovey?
with no worries in the world
with no arguments
with no disagreements
with no sadness



u think i like being like this?
feeling the tension everytime im near u
letting the numbness get to me
allowing myself to drop further and deeper into the black pit
u think i love it?



i hate moments like this too
moments where i cant express how i really feel cuz of the anger inside
moments where i cant say i love u when i know deep down inside i still do
moments where tears just comes non-stop in the middle of the night
moments where i just feel like giving up
moments where i just dont know what to do or say
moments where we're not lovey dovey
moments that makes us uncomfortable