no title again. dont know what to put. ahaha

well well well... yet another post without a title... i dont know what to put la. too lazy to slowly think of a title. hahaa.. actually.. i should be preparing my lesson for my babies tmr. cuz im teaching for cradle roll.. i think this is like my 3rd time teaching. ugh! i feel so stressed when i teach....

cuz firstly... the parents themselves dont care whether the babies pay attention or not. and secondly.... im just too shy to teach.

so wellsss... i guess i gotta get out of my comfort zone huh. but at least i dont mind teaching la. im okay with it. but shy... still shy.. cuz the parents are like older than me. so who am i to teach the babies right. somemore i dont have a baby of my own. how to understand them. sheesh. dont know la..


soooooo.. i know i should be preparing my lesson now. cuz andrew will be here in a matter of minutes to do the montage for alex and li ann's wedding. and their wedding is really just around the corner. this coming saturday. i just realized how fast it was. in my mind i still think that there's tons of time. but...... when eng kok announced it today during yf... i was like SHOCKEDDDD!!! i cant believe that their wedding is this saturday. oh my goshhhh!!!!! so fast so fast. now im feeeling the pressure for the montage. aww mann.. crazy.


but but but.. i wanna post here.. wanna update u guys. actually... i wanted to update sooner.. but i was feeling something that was uncertain. until now. ill explain later in my post.


so remember i was saying that im gonna go kdu to ask bout the pre-u.. well... they gotta get back to me. they gotta send my results to UNSW to see whether i qualify to go in. and if i can go in..... im gonna start my classes soon. actually they started classes di. but the counselor... or whatever she is says that i can just join in. pick up from where they left off.. im happy la if i can get in. but a part of me is scared. scared of whether i can cope with the class. cuz they started di u know. so im scared that i wont be able to catch up. u know me..... im LAZYYYYYYY!!!!!! bahsss

so i really do hope i can qualify. cuz the counselor said that i need to do all level 11. but all my major subjects.... LA, maths, and science is all in level 11 mar. so i think it should be alright....... right??????? bahhhsss... i hope and really pray that i can get into it. seriously. homeschooling sucks. ugh! whatever. i cant do much now la. since im done with it. all i can do now is pray and ask God for His favor. sheesh. irritatingsss...









now..... time to explain my uncertainties... as mentioned just now...
the past few days i was kinda scared la. scared of this relationship that im in with kevin. seriously. after a failed relationship..... i kinda somehow am scared to really give someone my heart again. im seriously scared la. like i cant help but think what if.... just what if.... we dont work out. then ill be like back with a broken heart. and i dont want that. no no no way. kevin is like all i ever wanted. seriously my dream come true.

but now i can truly say that im no longer scared. seriously. this might sound abit naik-bulu-roma. did i say it correctly? ahhaa. this might sound abit too mushy mushy. too lovey dovey. but....

everytime i spend time with kevin.
everytime i look into his eyes.
the 'I-LOVE-U'S'
everytime im around him.....

i can feel the love.
i can feel that this is gonna last.
i can feel that God's hands is upon us.

i just cant believe it. i cant believe that whatever i've ever hoped and prayed for....came true. God really has answered my prayers. whatever i've prayed for in a guy... thru the years... i really see it in him.

he knows how to crack me up
knows how to make me smile
knows how to share my problems
knows how to say that he understands
knows that im not perfect & accepts me as i am

i can finally say that..... i've found a guy who accepts me as who i am. and not trying to change me. he loves me for me.


so for this... i really thank God for everything. thank God for bringing me such a great guy. thank God for saving the best for last. thank God for giving this me this heart to feel love =)

last time.. before this.. before i got out of my heartache. i kept praying that God would take away my heart. cuz i dont wanna feel anything. esp. pain.... but now.... hahahaha.. i thank God that He didnt really take my words seriously. cuz it would be such a shame if i cant feel love from kevin.... or worse.......... God.

so kevin..... if ur reading this. im sorry if i didnt tell u how i feel earlier.. before i post this thing.. i wanna tell u. but i cant contain my joy. i gotta tell the world how happy i am now that im with u! ehehe. ok ok.. now im sending shivers down my own spine. *shivers* suddenly my room so cold one? hahahahahaahaha.