aihhh... its sooo tiring to clean up the new house and mop and all.. well, at least now its cleaner than last time... i want to shop!!!! but cant!!!!! no money!!!! =( sooo sadd... aihhhh... this few days is all thoughts and thoughts and thoughts and nothing but thoughts... and when i tell ppl bout it.. i feel they are no help at all.. cuz they'll say... "wahhh... such a coincidence..." "it's a sign"... my goodness... aihhh.. i really hope that person is feeling the same way as me.. like u know... love me back... holidays is such a drag... at least in school.. if im confused or having bad feelings.. as least i get to see him.. but now.. i dont at all.. and eden!!!! she's in leadership camp!!!!! until saturday somemore.. my goodness... aihhh... this is sadness mannn... somemore she wont be around for me to sms and chat with to.. to tell my feelings.. aihhh.. sooo sad...
just now i was watching this part in a movie... when this therapist was walking to her car... then suddenly a guy came up to her and pull her to the stairs and raped her.. my goodness.. when i was watching that part.. i was seriously sooo scared and traumatised by how bad the world can become.. and how cruel the world has become.. i remember telling my brother when we were watching csi... i told him that i dont want to be a girl anymore... cuz after seeing what girls have been treated in this world... really really scares me... but all this ends up to the song called.. u will never walk alone by point of grace... that song really stayed in my mind everytime im scared of the dark or after i watch a scary csi.. that song really brings me from my scary state of mind into a total inner peace.. cuz knowing that God and His angels are beside me.. taking care of me.. and protecting me of any evil thing in this world... every night i pray that God will just protect my family from any evil spirit or evil deeds from this world..
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